Madpup in Thanet

Margate's Big Event

2009-06-21T19:52:00.000-07:00

Took some friends by boat along the coast to palmbay where we moored up with a few other small boats, ready to watch the airshow away from the mad crowds and parking joke..

it turned out to be a really nice day out..shame a vendour couldnt have brought the hotdogs and candyfloss out to us, must remember next year to take rubber dingy to go ashore for food run,

heres a couple of shots done on saturday...

2009-02-04T00:51:00.000-08:00

This is the run up to the M25, as you can see the visibility was down to 20m and cars and lorrys was still passing me at speeds of about 70mph. total madness!!

Top 12 country songs for 2006

2008-08-06T02:13:00.001-07:00

12. I Hate Every Bone in Her Body But Mine.
11. It's Hard to Kiss the Lips At Night That Chewed Your Ass All Day.
10. If the Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me.
9. I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well.
8. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better.
7. I wouldn't take her to a Dog Fight 'Cause I'm Afraid she'd win.
6. I'll Marry You Tomorrow, But Let's Honeymoon Tonight.
5. I'm So Miserable without you, It's like you're Still Here.
4. If I Had Shot You When I First wanted To, I'd Be Out Of Prison By now.
3. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend and I Sure Do Miss Him.
2. She Got the Ring and I Got the Finger.
And the number 1 Country Song is:
1. I Ain't Never Gone to Bed with Ugly Women But I've Sure Woke Up With a Few

Thanks Joe P

10 pet peeves that dogs have about humans:

2008-08-06T02:09:00.000-07:00

10 pet peeves... from your dog

1. Blaming your farts on me.. not funny.. not funny at all !!!
2 Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!
3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!
5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo What a proud moment for the top of the
food chain.
7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
9. Dog sweaters Hello ???, Haven't you noticed the fur?
10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.
Now lay off me on some of these thing's. We both know who's boss here!!! You don't see me picking up your poop do you ???

Political correct speaking tips

2008-08-06T02:02:00.001-07:00

Political correct speaking tips
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN"
2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."
3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."
4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."
5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."
6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."
7. She ! does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED."
8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."
9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."
10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."
11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."
12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."
2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."
3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."
4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."
5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."
6. He does not get "FALLING- DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."
7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."
8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."
9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED"
11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE".

Murphy's 10 lesser known laws:

2008-08-06T00:55:00.000-07:00

Murphy's 10 lesser known laws:

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
2. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
3. Those that live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
4. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented dunce.
5. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
6. The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.
7. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll sit in a boat all day and drink beer.
8. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
9. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
10. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Security alerts spread across Europe

2007-06-27T02:44:00.000-07:00

Security alerts spread across Europe

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists themselves have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Obituary

2007-06-12T08:31:00.000-07:00

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was
since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as
knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm,
life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children,
are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year- old
boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens
suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental
consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a Band Aid to a student - but
could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to
have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better
treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize
that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in
her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust;
his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else
is to Blame, and I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and
do nothing.

************************************************************************

How to Clean a Toilet

2007-06-11T09:36:00.000-07:00

I found the following and though it might be of amusement to some here:

Instructions for cleaning the toilet:

1. Lift the lid on the toilet and fill it with 1/8 cup of animal shampoo.

2. Take the cat in your arms and stroke it gently while slowly moving in the direction of the toilet.

3. At a suitable moment, throw the cat into the toilet bowl and close the lid quickly and either stand or sit on the lid.

4. The cat will now start the cleaning process and will generate plenty of foam. Do not be concerned about the loud noises coming from the toilet; your cat is enjoying himself.

5. After several minutes flush the toilet to start the “Power-wash” pre-wash and then flush again for the main wash cycle.

6. Ask someone to open the front door and ensure that no-one is between the toilet and the front door.

7. Get off the toilet seat and from a safe distance open the toilet lid quickly. The cat will dry off naturally due to the high speed he will be moving from the toilet to the front door.

8. The toilet and the cat are now both clean.

Can you say that you too have lived?

2007-04-24T14:01:00.000-07:00

Just for a minute, forget everything stressful and read
this...............

Close your eyes and go back in time...
Before the Internet...
Before semi-automatics, joyriders and crack....
Before Playstations, x-box or Super Nintendo...

Way back......

I'm talking about Hide and Seek in the park.
The corner shop.
Hopscotch.
Butterscotch.
Skipping.
Handstands.
Football with an old can.
Fingerbobs.
Beano, Dandy, Buster, Twinkle and Dennis the menace.
Roly Poly.
Hula Hoops, jumping the stream, building dams.
The smell of the sun and fresh cut grass.
Bazooka Joe bubble gum.
An ice cream cone on a warm summer night from the van that plays a tune
Chocolate or vanilla or strawberry or maybe Neapolitan or perhaps a screwball.

Wait......

Watching Saturday morning cartoons, short commercials or the flicks.
Children's Film Foundation, The Double Deckers, Red Hand Gang, The Tomorrow People, Tiswas or Swapshop?, and 'Why Don't You'? - or staying up for Doctor Who.
When around the corner seemed far away and going into town seemed like going somewhere.
Earwigs, wasps, stinging nettles and bee stings.
White dog sh*t.
Sticky fingers.
Playing Marbles. Ball bearings. Big 'uns and Little 'uns.
Cops and Robbers, Cowboys and Indians, and Zorro.
Climbing trees.
Building igloos out of snow banks.
Walking to school, no matter what the weather.
Running till you were out of breath, laughing so hard that your stomach hurt.
Jumping on the bed. Pillow fights.
Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling down was cause for giggles.
Being tired from playing....remember that?
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team.
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon.
Football cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle.
Choppers and Grifters.
Twist grip 3 speed gears
Everyone had Police sirens on their bikes.
Small narrow skateboards and adjustable rollerskates
Eating raw jelly. Orange squash ice pops.

Remember when...

There were two types of trainers - girls and boys, and Dunlop Green Flash and the only time you wore them at school was for P.E.
You knew everyone in your street - and so did your parents.
It wasn't odd to have two or three "best" friends.
You didn't sleep a wink on Christmas eve.
When nobody owned a pure-bred dog.
When 25p was decent pocket money
Curly Wurlys. Space Dust. Toffo's.
Top Trumps.
When you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny.
When nearly everyone's mum was at home when the kids got there.
When any parent could discipline any kid, or feed him or use him to carry groceries and nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it.
When being sent to the head's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited a misbehaving student at home.
Basically, we were in fear for our lives but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs etc.
Parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! (and some of us are still afraid of them.) Didn't that feel good?

Just to go back and say, Yeah, I remember that!
Remember when....

Decisions were made by going " Ip Dip Dog Sh*t "
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest.
Money issues were handled by whoever was the banker in "Monopoly".
The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was germs.
And the worst thing in your day was having to sit next to one.
t was unbelievable that 'British Bulldog 123' wasn't an Olympic event.
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a catapult.
Nobody was prettier than Mum.
Scrapes and bruises were kissed and made better.
Taking drugs meant orange-flavoured chewable aspirin.
Ice cream was considered a basic food group.
Getting a foot of snow was a dream come true.
Older siblings were the worst tormentors, but also the fiercest protectors.

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have LIVED.

__________________

Heineken Race of the Classics

2007-04-20T00:59:00.000-07:00

(20 April 2007)

I got up at 0500am hoping for a sunrise to take some great shots of theses fantastic ships,
unfortunately to much cloud, never mind i did manage to get a few good shots, including some from the air yesterday, i will post some more later.

A flotilla of tall ships visited Ramsgate for the 19th edition of the Race of the Classics. Many of these historic vessels date back to the turn of the twentieth century and are crewed by professional sailors and students.

Manston Wings and Wheels.

2007-04-08T05:47:00.000-07:00

What a great day out, shame it was not advertised so well,
it was only that i happen to be coming home from work that i saw it,
it was probably in the free papers, but i don't get them any more,
well done to all all the volunteers and all the people that took the time and effort to dress up to make this a good day out, would it not be great if this council could get funding for a MUCH bigger building to display our heritage instead of that potting shed that house's
what could be a very nice tourist attraction.
I know it would be visited more often than that Tuner shite.

2007-04-06T13:54:00.000-07:00

Fame at last

2007-03-22T12:16:00.000-07:00

Iv been added to Eastcliff Richards "Exciting New Talent" links
it was after read Richards blog that i decided i would create one too,
many thanks Richard.
I will get round to doing a links list soon too as there is a lot of talented folks in thanet.

2007-03-04T18:38:00.000-08:00

A new batch of aerial photos have been added to the site (madpup.co.uk)
iv tried making the photo album using photoshop cs2,
must say it was very easy and quick,
the new photos take in acol, manston, ramsgate and minster,
go take a look and let me know what you think.

Being British

2007-02-26T10:44:00.000-08:00

Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of anything foreign

Oh and...... Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions, while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink. NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.

101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control Scalextric cars.

and finally......... In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

I am proud to be British (We might be British but hell we're funny !!)

Where are all the police officers gone?

2007-02-26T10:29:00.000-08:00

why is it i can get mugged in a street in Thant, wait twenty minutes for the police to turn up, to be told its too late to do anything about it!!!
while ten minutes up the road there is four patrol cars, including a dog handler, two nervous looking customs and excise men checking if the working man has put red derv in the tank.
Iv worked out its becouse the mugger will cost the goverment money while the hard working van driver, if cought could end up giving money to the goverment.
Im not saying putting red derv in your tank is right, but why does this goverment go after the soft target?

Photos on this site

2007-02-26T03:11:00.001-08:00

If you belong to a press association and wish to use a full copy of a picture on this site they are free to you with conditions , please email me,
Members of the public wishing to have a copy of any of the pictures on this site again please email me, prices start from £10,
Members of Thanet Council wishing to use any of the pictures on this site for advertising or any other use, please email me, prices start at £500000000.

Im also available for commission work including aerial,
Again please email me.